This post is following a twitter battle I had concerning Addek vs. MerDer
Well, it was argued that Addison brought out the “cutsey” side of Derek… when? All I saw throughout the 2nd season pertaining to Addison, Derek and Meredith was sadness, bad sex and heartbreak. When he’s with Meredith, Derek’s eyes light up and he’s happy. He dances, they have hot sex… With Addison, his eyes had a grayish downcast and he always looked teary. Also, they never had good sex, showing the lack of physical chemistry which was sprung from the lack of love. Addison even told Meredith on the phone, thinking she was the vet (who doesn’t deserve a name), that they were trying to have good sex.
“I can’t compete. He’s not having an affair. He’s not trying to hurt me. He’s just… the only people who don’t know that Derek loves Meredith are Derek and Meredith. How do I compete with that?”
By the end Addison realizes that Derek doesn’t really even love her anymore.
“I want you to care. I sleep with your best friend, and you walk away. Then he comes out here from New York and rubs it in your face, and you still get a good night’s sleep. What do I have to do? Oh, I know. Maybe what I should do is go out on a date with the vet, because that seems to be something that sends you into a blinding rage. Oh, but wait. That won’t work either because I’m not Meredith Grey.”
Addison also chose to ignore that Derek probably really fell out of love with her after she cheated on him with Mark.
In general, MerDer is a stronger couple. Sure they had their issues but that was because Meredith had a horrible childhood, making it understandable that she had some trust issues and abandonment issues. With Ellis Grey as a mother and the little bitch, Thatcher Grey for a father you can see where her problems would spring from. But, their love was strong and true. And unbreakable vow that only got separated by a bitch horsefaced little tart who doesn’t deserve a name. Derek didn’t love her at all. She was just a desperate little thing and during sex, he thought about Meredith the WHOLE time.
Some questions posed by an Addek fan:
If he had no love for Addison, why were they married for 11 years? Well, he had no love her her after she cheated on Mark, before? Sure. He wrote her a freaking idiotic song.
If his love for Meredith was so amazing and true than why did he call her a whore? Jealousy makes us do bad things. And, when we’re angry (jealous in this case) we take it out on the ones we love because we know they’ll stand by us. Example: 5×17 (in my opinion, one of the best representations of Meredith’s growth and the strength of MerDer)
Why did he pick Addison over Meredith? If he really truly loved Meredith so much at that time, he would’ve divorced Addison right away and been with Meredith if his love for her was so powerful. I know he felt like he was obligated to try, but he would’ve picked Meredith in the first place if he truly felt nothing for Addison anymore. Well, Derek is a good guy. He’s freaking McDreamy. If he’d picked Meredith originally he would have failed himself and not even put up a fight. Obligation is the right word. He was obligated to try with Addison, his WIFE, because Derek Christopher Shepherd is a good guy. And he still loved her even if he wasn’t in love with her so he felt that he had the relationship, making his act worse, and she deserved for him to at least try.
Few more parting notes:
a) When Derek found Mark and Addison he just walks out. When he sees Mark TALKING to Meredith, he punches him out.
“It’s funny. Derek walks in on me naked with his wife, and just turns around and walks away. But then he sees me so much as talking to you, and I’m on the ground bleeding. Interesting, don’t you think?”
b) Going back to 5×17. Watch it, learn it, love it, interpret it.
– So what team are you? You can only be one.
Addek vs. MerDer